What I Should Do When My Child Struggles In School?
Many kids breeze through early grades, always expecting the new school year to pose no more of a challenge than the last. But each new grade brings increasing amounts of work, greater complexity, and higher expectations. Sometimes these challenges can unexpectedly creep up on a student, which may cause him to struggle or feel frustrated and overwhelmed.
As children develop mentally and physically through grade school, their rates of academic success fluctuate dramatically. Even if their ages are relatively close, students will often be in different phases of learning.
Ultimately, you want your child to be able to work through frustration and bounce back when he encounters obstacles or failures. Mistakes and setbacks are an expected and essential part of learning and can be a great stimulus for improvement. Let your child know you are there when he needs you, but don’t rush to jump in before he asks.
If your child enters a new grade and seems to lag behind his classmates, avoid blaming his teacher from the previous year and criticizing her preparation as inadequate. Instead of focusing on what could have been learned in the past, concentrate on getting your child on track for the future.
Many children hesitate to admit when they don’t understand what is being taught in class because they do not want to appear slow and unintelligent to their teacher and peers. Instead, they go to great lengths to hide their need for help.
If your child encounters academic difficulties, he may start to feel angry, demoralized, and incompetent. These feelings manifest in a variety of ways, most typically through acting out in frustration and disengaging socially. Take signs of potential academic problems seriously. Meet with his teacher to discuss your observations and brainstorm potential ways to solve the situation.
When a teacher brings up academic problems with which your child is wrestling, ask to look at concrete examples, like test scores and samples of homework. This helps you get a better sense of where the problem stems from and the best means of intervention. Perhaps he is neglecting a certain subject because he does not understand the material, or, conversely is too comfortable with the subject matter that he neglects to do the extra practice.
Your child’s insights and feedback are vital to tackling any problems in his education. Ask him where his major sources of frustration originate. By encouraging him to express himself and letting him know his opinions are respected and valued, you reassure him that you and his teacher are working with him, not against him.
There will be times in every student’s life when he is disinterested in a subject, or when he is more concerned with his socializing than academics. As long as he has a strong base and a passion for learning, he will eventually bounce back.
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